Thursday, June 01, 2006


Almost forgot that today was Blogging for LGBT Families Day. So, thanks Gandksmom for reminding me.

And here we go...

Although this is already pretty obviously an LGBT family blog, I mostly focus on the day-to-day trials and tribulations of raising 3-year old twins with my partner of almost 8 1/2 years and our two dogs.

So today, I thought I'd share a little something with you that most of you may not know.

Shortly after having the kids, we contacted an attorney to find out what we needed to do to make Amy their other legal mother. Tons of paperwork, a visit with a social worker, one happy day in court, and a couple thousand dollars later, she became legally reconized as their mother in the state of Washington.

And I remember thinking at the time how scary it all was. How at any point, it could all fall apart and someone could just say 'no' and that would be it. Amy would never have been their mother -- legally. If something ever happened to me, they would be taken away from her. Let me say that again -- they would be taken away from her. Away from the only other parent they've ever known and loved. Away from the only home they've ever had. Away from the only place they've ever felt safe and secure. And our family would be destroyed.

And, of course, I realize how lucky we were to have lived in a state where 2nd parent adoptions were legal (well, in Seattle anyway); where LGBT attorneys were plentiful; where open-minded family-conscious social workers were readily available to walk you through the process and remind you how amazing it was that you were doing this when you step back and think about all the people, single or otherwise, that have children and don't care about them -- don't want to support them -- don't want to even claim them sometimes -- and even abandon them to a complete stranger, the elements, or worse.

And here we were...choosing to do this. Choosing these children every step of the way. Painstakingly choosing their donor. Painfully choosing to endure the shots, the invasive procedures, the skepticism of our family and friends, the absence of support from our own country, our own government. Choosing to be their mothers more than anything else in the world, regardless of the expense, the uphill battles, the legal hoops we had to jump through. We chose then and continue to choose their lives every day since then.

So, I guess today I'd like to raise my glass to the Choose Lifers because, like it or not, folks, I choose life, too.

X-posted at my other blog...

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